Mean Mom

There are some days that I feel guilty because I can not wait for Jackson to get on the bus and go to school.  Today is one of those days.  He has been throwing fits the last couple of days whenever I have to redirect him.  It has been a long weekend!  We have been fortunate enough that he hasn't been throwing full-blown tantrums, but wrestling a 4 1/2 year old while your 18 month-old is screaming at you and you are 7 months pregnant isn't always a cakewalk.

I also feel guilty because in our home I get the fun title of "Disciplinarian". Yay!  Which means Matt is always the good guy.  To be honest, there really isn't a lot of discipline in our home because Jackson doesn't understand his wrong actions yet.  In the classes I attend regularly they teach that you use consequences rather than punishments for most situations.  However, Jackson has begun some destructive behaviors which we need to put a stop to right away.  He has been finding pens or crayons around the house (he can reach all the drawers and shelves) and started to write on different surfaces.  So far the casualties have been my rocking chair and a table.  My husband Matt tattles on Jackson and I am the one who has to show Jackson what he has done wrong and put him in timeout.  I think I am going to start insisting we rotate that part, because it is difficult to get upset at Jackson.   

Obviously, this is a huge learning experience for our whole family.  Our family dynamic is going to be very different from most families and we will have to rely on the people we know that are facing the same challenges for their advice. 

Christmas Break

I used to really look forward to Christmas Break.  It is an exciting time that is full of family, parties and best of all, no school!  Yeah... that was before being a parent.  Especially a parent of a child with autism.  It's not that I don't enjoy spending time with Jackson, but it really throws a wrench in his routine.  Consistency is critically important for children with autism.  When Jackson was younger, he was more flexible. As he has become more aware of the world around him, I think he struggles with the inability of being able to communicate his needs and control his environment. 
 Despite his frustration, I feel like he did really well at parties for the most part.  There were a couple of tantrums and we didn't really get to socialize at most of the parties, but we made it through.  Our life is just different now.

Jackson didn't have any therapists during Christmas break either. After a week, he started displaying more negative behaviors.  He would scream, get naked, hit his head on the floor, get naked, push his little brother over, get naked, hit his head on the wall, get naked, jump off ridiculously high things and .....did I mention get naked?  I also failed as a parent by not preparing him for the transition of going to a new church class this year.  He had a meltdown when his class was led into a new classroom with new teachers.  Honestly, I didn't even think about it!  I am so grateful that we have an understanding primary presidency and an amazing aid that are so concerned that Jackson is learning and having a positive church experience. I think that we have everything worked out for next week, but time will tell.

Jackson has been able to get back into his routine and he finally seems to be happy and regulated.  He has been smiling a lot and is excited to work with his teachers. (sigh of relief)

                                                              Brotherly Love

                                                    I love Jackson's face in this one!

iPad and Grandpa

My Little Action Jackson

This is a blog about my special little boy, Jackson.  Jackson has autism. He is an amazing example of strength.  There have been some big obstacles in his short life, but he is one resilient boy.  I want to keep this blog as a record of his goals and achievements.  He is making strides every day and I can't wait to look back at this blog and think, "Wow! I forgot he hasn't always been able to *insert accomplishment*!  I can't believe how far he has come!" 

Here is a timeline of Jackson's life:

• Jackson was born on July 27, 2009 in the Northwest Chicago suburbs.  He weighed 8lbs & 6oz and was 21 1/2 inches long.  He is our first child and has his dad's big hazel eyes with ridiculously long eyelashes.
• Jackson started crawling at 5 months.
• Jackson started walking at 11 months.
• Jackson turned 1 year old.  He was above average in gross and fine motor skills.  We were still waiting for his first word.
• Jackson turned 15 months old with very few sounds and no distinct expressive words.  I started to worry.  Our pediatrician group said his lack of language "is normal for a boy", so I didn't worry for a couple more months. 
• At 18 months I began desperately believing that the few little sounds he was babbling were his attempt at speech.  In my mind, "ch" became "cheese" and "ba" became bottle.  He would look me in the eyes and loved to be tickled.  He would give kisses and wave "goodbye" if you asked him to.
• Jackson turned 20 months and we went to a pediatric plastic surgeon and found out he had a condition called Craniosynostosis.  It is a premature fusing of one or more sutures of the skull.  His metopic suture, which is the one that runs medially in the frontal bone, was fused too early giving him a narrow forehead.  Potentially, there is a risk this could cause too much pressure on the brain which could result in migraines, brain damage or blindness.
• Jackson turned 21 months old and had major surgery on his skull.  Everything went smoothly and after staying in the PICU a few days, we felt like the worst was over.  I had a discussion with a lady at my church that casually mentioned that if I was at all worried about Jackson's cognitive development there are early intervention programs available.  I had never heard of early intervention and my pediatrician group still hadn't raised any red flags.  I will forever be grateful to this women for telling me about early intervention.  If it hadn't been for her, I would have most likely gone another 6 months without getting him into this essential program. 
• When Jackson turned 22 months we received the opportunity to move back to Utah where both sets of Jackson's grandparents live.
• I called Kids on the Move early intervention in May and it was the beginning of July before we had someone come out.  I wasn't sure he would qualify for services, but it was made clear to me at the assessment that he more than qualified.  A couple of weeks later he started seeing therapists.  
• August 2011 Jackson started at a school that specializes in autism called Bridges.  We made lifelong friends here and contacts that have been invaluable to our family.
• Jackson received an official diagnosis of autism December 2011.  He was only 2 1/2 years old.
• I went to the Autism Treatment Center of America to learn a special therapy called Son-Rise in April 2012.  After returning we had some of the sweetest family members and friends come and volunteer their time to work with Jackson.  Many of these amazing individuals are still working with Jackson today! 
• In July 2012 we had Jackson's first IEP.  He qualified for an all day preschool program at Alpine School District in an "autism unit".  Early intervention stopped when he turned 3 years old.
• August 2012 Jackson started at his new school and started riding the bus.
• We entered Jackson's name in the state's "Autism Waiver" lottery and his name was drawn in November 2012.  This was a miracle for our family.  Because of this lottery he qualified for several autism private schools we had little chance of ever getting in and additional at home ABA therapy. 
• Giant Steps started a satellite school in Saratoga Springs in February 2013 and there was room for Jackson to go there!  We had been trying to get Jackson into this school for over 2 years. 
• In April 2013 at home ABA starts for Jackson.
• August 2013 is the start of another school year at Giant Steps for Jackson.

Whew! Can you imagine how long that would have been if I went into detail!?  These are the major events that have shaped our family's lives.  I will touch on some of these events in future posts, but I think this should be adequate for now.
  
I would also like to increase autism awareness in any way that I can.  The rate of children diagnosed with autism in the United States is currently 1 in 88 and in the state of Utah it is 1 in 47 (1 in 32 for boys).  This is an issue that needs to be addressed NOW!  Unfortunately, it is human nature to not understand the urgency of a problem unless it affects a person directly.  However, with the statistics constantly growing more significant, odds are that at some point everybody will in some way be affected by autism.  So this will be my attempt at spreading the word and hopefully some understanding about something that literally shapes my life every day.  In the words of the amazing Temple Grandin, these individuals are "different, not less".  

-Aubree